Party Rock Anthem

There are many things in modern music that I just do not understand. Often, things that are highly popular are worthless pieces of garbage, and high quality work gets overlooked. Sometimes you get an exception, such as with Mumford and Sons, who are really good AND really popular.

And then you have groups like LMFAO, who somehow embody everything you love and hate about music all at the same time.

LMFAO makes party music. This means that there is no depth to their music (the hated thing). This also means that they don’t take themselves seriously (the loved thing).

Therefore, LMFAO’s newest hit song, Party Rock Anthem, is simultaneously awful and amazing. And the music video is even more mind-blowing.

Between line-dancing, a Zombie Plague, and really tight leopard print pants, this video is more impressive than proper use of an Oxford comma.

Let’s break it down, shall we?

0:00 – Actually, before we get started, let’s think about two things here:

1. This band’s name is LMFAO. Seriously.
2. They are the son and grandson of Motown founder Berry Gordy. That’s right: LMFAO is an uncle/nephew duo.

Okay, when you finally wrap your head around these two absurd facts, press play.

0:18 – Sweet, the Zombie Plague video theme makes its appearance. Not gonna lie, this has potential. I mean, it’s clearly 28 Days Later!

0:22-0:36 – Just a small thing, but doesn’t there normally need to be medical equipment to make those beeping noises? Like I said, minor detail.

P.S. SICK gold watch.

0:40 – Our heroes, in all their glory. Second guessing the decision to watch this video now. Only took 40 seconds. I think I survived longer during the Rebecca Black incident. That might have been a zombie joke.

0:54 – And here, they prove that they are NOT actors.

0:55 – Look, I’m normally not a stickler about these things, but somebody tell this guy where to find some actual pants. Or how to lose some weight.

Sorry, too much? Funny, cause that’s what I told him at lunch.

Alright, sorry, I’m done.

1:03 – The Two-Step? The Watusi? These guys don’t actually know anything about dancing, do they?

Gotta love the gratuitous hand motions and shoulder shrugs.

1:10 – LMFAO prove once again that they were not put on this earth to act.

1:12-1:24 – Ah, the back story. At this point, you should pause, because we have a few things to discuss.

1. They created this song, right? That intro text said that their song was released right after they slipped into comas. So the song that is blaring right now is theirs.
2. Everyone in the world is being turned into shuffling zombies. This doesn’t necessarily seem like a terrible thing, but apparently it is.
3. Zombification is being caused by that song. That they made.
4. They are clearly the villains here. We were fools to have trusted them.

1:36 – PRODUCT PLACEMENT

1:39-1:44 – Once again, not normally a stickler, nor am I fashionable by any means, but if I were dressed like some of these people, I would NOT be out in public.

2:02 – First glimpse of the guy you’ll be rooting for during the rest of this video.

2:05-2:15 – What exactly makes this guy think that this is the best time to cross the street? Kind of obvious that it won’t end well. POOR PLANNING, MY FRIEND.

2:24 – Okay, wait just a second. LMFAO guys are terrified because people are being turned into….THEM? What would happen if they got caught? Would they come out of it with clean hair and polo shirts?

2:26 – This is my favorite part of the video. Watch Shirt ‘n Tie Guy in the background. He apparently gets bored with this entire video and just walks away.

2:39 – Here’s the first verse….or possibly the only verse.

2:53 – Second (kinda) verse. Please note that the two verses in the song are poorly rhymed, hard to hear, and last barely 12 seconds apiece.

What kind of facial expression is that? It’s like he scared and confused about why they’re making a music video.

3:08 – By this point, the whole “zombie” idea has been abandoned. They realized it wasn’t working, and it left with Shirt ‘n Tie Guy.

3:35 – Wait, are they scared again? They were fine two seconds ago.

3:39 – “Great song guys! How long was it?….2 minutes? Really? Oh. Okay. Guess we’ll have to come up with something else for a few minutes….”

3:40 – The beginning of the best dance I’ve ever seen. Because I’m pretty sure I could actually learn this. It’s the Cotton-Eyed Joe on crack.

I can stomp on beat! I can move one appendage at a time! I can wear a cardboard robot head! LMFAO APPEALS TO ME!

4:12-4:25 – Okay, is this another verse? A bridge? This song has no structure.

And the lesson to learn tonight is that hatin’ is bad. Good to know.

4:25-4:55 – What exactly is her purpose in this song? I mean, I can tell by the way she’s dressed what her “purpose” in the video is. But what does she contribute to the song itself? She just repeats the same thing over and over again. That’s all.

Actually, this is a great time to pause and examine the song structure:

1. Extended intro.
2. Hook.
3. 12 second long verse.
4. 12 second long verse.
5. Hook.
6. Dance break!
7. Bridge-thing.
8. ….build up?
9. Chorus/Dance Break!

For not having any actual content, this song is COMPLICATED.

4:53-4:55 – That can’t be comfortable.

4:58 – Wait, who is this? Has this guy been here the whole time?

5:00 – The big dance break. Let’s be honest: this is the only reason this video was ever made.

5:21-5:23 – Okay, who invited Ben Folds?

5:27-5:34 – I told you the robot would be your favorite.

5:47 – “Ladies and gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to JOHN THE BAPTIST!”

6:00 – “Oh geez guys, we have no idea how to end this video.”

This is what American music has become. I hope you’re happy. Cause for whatever reason, I am. And I can’t figure it out. I just watched this video about 20 times working on this post, and I want to watch it 20 more.

….oh geez guys, I have no idea how to end this post.