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Video Breakdown: Pryde of The X-Men, Pt. 1

When planning an animated television show, typically you don’t start with the question “How LITTLE effort can we put into this?”

X-Men: Pryde of the X-Men was apparently the exception. The creators seemed perfectly fine putting out a product that seemed to have pieced together in someone’s basement one weekend. The action is rushed, the dialog is useless, and character development is nonexistent.

Take a look for yourself, and there will be no wonder as to why a regular X-Men show didn’t happen for another three years.

0:00 – 0:33 – While enjoying this musical masterpiece, you may get confused about all the action sequences going on. Don’t worry. They’re literally all clips from the rest of the episode. You will see ALL of this again.

0:33 – 0:52 – Oh good! Stan Lee is here to hastily explain EVERYTHING THAT IS GOING ON.

1:01 – 1:06  – At this point, you might get the feeling that things are just going to be explained to you during the entire show. (P.S. You’re right)

1:18 – 1:24 – Okay, besides the fact that they have him captured in his full costume, isn’t it also just a LITTLE strange that he openly refers to his group as Mutant Terrorists? I mean, come on Magneto. You could at least TRY to give us a reason to root for you.

Also, explain to me what that generic military guy is hoping to accomplish by charging at him.

1:31 – 1:33 – Rick Moranis?

1:34 – 1:39 – And now we get a useless explanation of events from the White Queen, who is apparently voiced by a 90 year old. Enjoy this scene. She won’t do anything important for the rest of this show.

2:02 – 2:06 – That….that’s all it took for Magneto to escape? Just everyone being distracted for a second?

2:16 – 2:18 – Is “Swatting a gnat” supposed to be witty banter? Because it’s not.

2:24 – 2:26 – There’s ol’ Rick, delivering his catchphrase again!

2:36 – 2:39 – Robot Cabbie sure speaks clearly for obviously driving away.

2:41 – 2:44 – DECIDE WHAT YOU’RE LOOKING AT

2:54 – Is…is that all the letter said?

3:07 – “Because I’m too lazy to greet you myself.”

3:09 – 3:18 – Great. More gratuitous explanation.

3:34 – “Also, my parents were totally cool with me hopping in a taxi alone and going to upstate New York to meet a stranger who sent me a letter filled with all my secrets. That might be worth noting.”

3:44 – 3:48 – You can travel through solid matter and are JUST now realizing this fact?

3:56 – 3:58 – Comforting arm pats.

4:12 – 4:16 – “And today, we’re exterminating the Mayans!”

4:31 – 4:33 – Was he wearing that under his khaki Dickie’s suit? And what noises is he making?

4:42 – Great. Colossus’ first words are “IZ GUD”

4:46 – “She honestly couldn’t matter LESS. I’m not even sure we gave her any lines!”

5:15 – “And smug enough to be hated by everyone.”

5:25 – Seriously? That’s ALL we have to say about Storm? “Here she is. We don’t get it. MOVING ON!”

5:52 – 5:58 – Nightcrawler, ladies and gentlemen! Creepiest person alive!

6:22 – 6:27 – So, is “IZ GUD” all that Colossus can say?

6:32 – WHAT IS THAT NOISE COMING OUT OF HIS MOUTH. Not only have they given the Canadian character an Australian accent, it is the WORST Aussie accent ever. It’s like if you punched Paul Hogan in the mouth 12 times then mic’d him up.

6:45 – This is their method for calming teammates? A useless mini-storm?

7:04 – TWO SECONDS AGO Kitty was terrified. Now she’s suddenly eager to help?

7:12 – 7:16 – The Deep Space Observatory? Of course!

7:22 – FORESHADOWING

7:36 – Seriously, Nightcrawler. Stop it.

7:55 – First step for the Mutant Terrorists? Destroy other mutants. Hmm….

8:00 – Oh great. In danger, but STILL have time for an explanation.

8:38 – 8:45 – “OOOOOOOH YEEEEEEAAAAAAAH”

9:28 – Her panic move? Casually tossing the one thing she was supposed to protect.

9:38 – 9:50 – Yes, at the first sign of danger, the X-Men swiftly abandon their crippled leader!

10:11 – And here Colossus refers to himself in the 3rd person. At least he didn’t start the sentence with “IZ GUD!”

10:32 – 10:35 – Oh good! We get TWO awful Australian accents in this show!

10:40 – Please note what Wolverine was trying to say before being cut off.

10:46 – 10:50 – Nightcrawler LEAPS into action to creepily save that doll!

10:52 – 10:55 – Umm….who were those people? Just random guys who got kidnapped?

10:56 -Those are sirens. And apparently police surrounding the place. Keep in mind they are ON A SPACE STATION.

Join us on Monday for Part 2 probably!

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About The Joseph Craven

I'm tall, but not so tall that people point and stare.

5 responses to “Video Breakdown: Pryde of The X-Men, Pt. 1”

  1. M. Scott says :

    How can Prof. X read Magneto’s thoughts when he has his helmet on? For a show that explains everything they still leave some questions.

  2. Mandie Marie says :

    Several things.

    1. That was a full episode? Because I feel as though I was watching clips of several episode.

    2. I read the ““OOOOOOOH YEEEEEEAAAAAAAH” before watching the video and thought “pleasepleaseplease let something big and red crash through a wall”. Thank you for your brilliance.

    3. 2:41-2:44 is by far my favourite part.

    4. Comment #2 sounded too nice.

    5. I hate you.

    • The Joseph Craven says :

      1. It was actually half of an episode. Like I said, not very well planned out.

      2. It was a loaded joke, as his voice also sounds a lot like Macho Man Randy Savage. There was so much I could have said there!

      3. Seriously! What was wrong with her?

      4. It made me sick.

      5. Shut up, Turd.

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