Flip Flop Rock
All genres of music lend themselves to the occasional bad song. Rock music has good and bad songwriters, just as terrible composers surely existed back in the days of Beethoven, and just like how every pop song today makes your ears bleed. And yes, one could argue that for every Bob Dylan there existed a George Thorogood (more like ThoroBAD) when it came to songwriting.
In rap music, however, the spectrum is much, much wider. For every Chiddy Bang (on the good side of the spectrum), there exist at least 10 Soulja Boys (the WORST).
Never trust a man with a leopard print hat
If none of those names mean anything to you, that’s fine. None of that is terribly important. Rap music does have its fair share of great songwriters, its versions of Bob Dylan, if you will. And just like Bob Dylan, sometimes they don’t make any sense whatsoever.
Never trust a man with that kind of hat, either
Derweze
In the middle of the Karakum Desert, located in Turkmenistan, lies the peaceful sleepy village of Derweze. Home to some 350 semi-nomadic members of the Teke tribe, Derweze sits around 290 kilometers north of Ashgabat, which as we all know is the capital of Turkmenistan.
Because who HASN’T heard of the City of Love and their giant enclosed Ferris wheel?
If you’re unfamiliar with the village of Derweze, don’t worry. Truth be told, you likely aren’t aware of the towns in your own state with 350 residents, much less on the other side of the world. Simply put, there’s nothing outstanding about Darweze.
Except for, you know, the Door to Hell.
OH NO
Steve Jobs, Pt. 2
Previously on The GBOAT: we took a look at the early life of Steve Jobs, along with the founding of Apple and his later dismissal from Apple. Didn’t read it? I don’t blame you. But you can go back and start from the beginning by clicking this link or something I guess.
Sometimes, your bad decisions come back to decide you aren’t a good fit for you company and fire you. It happens all the time. In the case of Steve Jobs, it left him with a bunch of money and a thirst for blood. Business blood.
After being removed from Apple, Jobs responded the only way a bitter computer programmer could: he founded a rival computer company called NeXT and convinced Ross Perot to invest heavily.
Think Different, y’all
Steve Jobs, Pt. 1
For the next few weeks, The Greatest Blog Of All Time will be running a series on the life and times of the late Steve Jobs, founder of Apple and the man who saved America from our sins of using PCs.
The motto of the American Dream is “Get rich or die trying” (copyright 2005, 50 Cent). If there is one thing that American culture values more than a heartwarming rags to riches story, it’s the story of somebody who went from rags to riches and then got fired but then got MORE riches and built any future success upon a foundation of spite. Because of this, nobody epitomizes this American spirit more than Apple founder Steve Jobs.
Truly, the story of Steve Jobs is one of overcoming adversity and failure to become overwhelmingly arrogant and stubborn successful. Truly, it is the story of a man who had the entire population of a country hanging onto his every word, and he had full control of them.
Truly, it is the story of the American Dream.
“You guys see this? This thing in my hand? It will rule your life, and therefore I will rule your life”
Nicolas Cage
Since the beginning of time, mankind has been on a search for a punchline: a universal joke that can be used in any and all circumstances and will always be found funny, regardless of relevance or timeliness.
According to the Internet, which serves as our dispenser of knowledge and truth, we have found that eternal punchline: the films of Sir Nicolas Cage.
Also the face, personality, and existence of Sir Nicolas Cage
The War Of 1812
While I enjoy the final week of my Canadian summer vacation (The novelty of my American accent has rubbed off, so I’m require to leave), The GBOAT will feature Canadian themed posts. Maybe you’ll learn something but let’s be honest: you’re only skimming.
Do you remember The War of 1812? It happened 200 years ago this year, which is interesting because no American cares to talk much about the War of 1812. There are no bicentennial celebrations going on. The casual American citizen remembers that the White House was destroyed and really doesn’t recall anything else. In fact, that’s even giving casual citizens a lot of credit.
The War of 1812 probably
